I think it is important that people understand my writing process, so that when you read my blog you don't think I am in the midst of a potential emotional crisis.
Typically by the time I am at the point of writing things down I am either over the current crisis or I am out of the midst of the crisis and writing is my way of processing. This doesn't mean that I never write when I am in the middle of a crisis, but I do try to write when I am not in the middle of the emotional moment so that I don't write things I will regret later.
Typically an issue or incident occurs, then I survive it, then I process it and then I write about it. So by the time you read it, the incident is over and there is an ending to what I have written about. I appreciate the comments of support more than you can ever know. It means the world to me to know that people are in our corner and that I have a community who understand the crazy we live in. I just don't want people worrying unnecessarily and felt it was important to let you all in on my writing process.
I have given a lot of thought recently to making my blog private or making people sign in before they read my blog, but over the years I have had people reach out and say they are living through a similar life that I never would have guessed would benefit from my blog. For that reason I don't want to make it private because that would create a stumbling block for sharing our story.
People have reached out who have family members who share David's genetic duplication, and people have reached out who have children who struggle with mental health issues and fetal alcohol syndrome. For this reason I am keeping my blog public but I do have concern that it is upsetting people recently and I am trying to be very sensitive to this as my goal is not to upset my children's teachers, or therapists or my family members or friends. This is me writing about our story from my perspective. At times my perspective and understanding of life is wrong or one sided, but also I am juggling a full plate, and so often I am dealing with multiple issues at the same time.
I am working on getting some help for myself because I realize I am currently juggling too much and feeling overwhelmed. The biggest message I want to share with you all is that I am ok- I am stressed and at times overwhelmed, but for the most part I am ok. Between raising these 3 boys, juggling school needs for them, and juggling a new self direction program for them that is supposed to make respite easier, but has truly just added a lot of work to my already full plate, there are tons of ups and downs. However, the ups are higher because i have often waited a long time for them, but that often means the downs are lower than average, but we will get through them.
Last week I read through my blog and realized what dark times we have come through. By comparison, we are doing so well. And for that I am forever thankful.
- I am a single mom of three amazing boys! All three of my sons entered my family through adoption. All three of my boys have developmental disabilities. My oldest son, Matthew has been diagnosed with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and Bipolar Disorder. David, my middle son, has a genetic condition, he has a duplication on his 15th chromosome which leads to autism like symptoms, seizures and learning challenges. My youngest son, Jacob has learning disabilities. Each of my children bring unique challengs to our family and also bring their own personality and joys to our everyday life!